Cadan is growing so fast! We have had several outings, even going to Yosemite.
We are enjoying every moment with our little man!
Monday, May 16, 2011
Update
We met with our social worker last week. She said everything is going well on the legal side of the adoption. Relinquishment has been signed by the birth mother and filed in Sacramento, they should be receiving confirmation anytime now, then we can have a party! :) The agency's private investigator is looking into the birth father. They found an address and if it is current will serve him for court and he will have 30 days, then the court will terminate his rights.
Cadan is growing so fast! We have had several outings, even going to Yosemite.
Cadan is growing so fast! We have had several outings, even going to Yosemite.
Monday, May 9, 2011
Mother's Day
What a blessing to be able to celebrate Mother's Day as a mother myself! We had two days full of celebrating mamas. It was fabulous!
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| Mama McCormack, Me & Cadan, and Mama Lamb |
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Pictures
A few more pictures...it wouldn't let me upload more to the last post.
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| Is this not the cutest outfit! Love the shoes! |
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| We are prety sure his hair will be curly since he is 3/4 black, but you never know. It is pretty straight now. |
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| Cadan loves the wrap! He hangs out in it every time we go out somewhere. It keeps people from touching him with their germy hands too! |
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| He loves the bath in this little tub. He did not like it in a big one though. I think he feels more secure in this one. |
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| This is what our day consists of, and we love it! Jake has 4 weeks off work and I have 8. We are soaking it up! |
Our first week
Cadan has been a very easy baby so far. He didn't even cry when he went to the doctor and had to get a heel prick. He was very healthy at his check up...he still measured the same as he did at discharge, 6lb 11oz and 20in. We really liked the pediatrician we saw at Kaiser and plan to use him as our primary.
Our little man is a mover and wiggler! He is so strong too. We have a book (I posted a picture of it earlier, the black, red, and white book) that he loves to stare at. He also enjoys his bouncer Auntie Crystal got for him. 
His umbilical cord stump fell off after only 5 days. We were able to give him a bath and he LOVED it!
We are looking forward to newborn pictures with Gina Guthrie on Saturday and Mother's Day on Sunday. We can't even express how blessed we feel! Life has truly never been better!
Home!
Our first day home was filled with many visitors! There is no lack of love and attention for this child!
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| Grammy and Grandma |
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| Grandpa |
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| Papa |
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| Aunties and Cousin Taylor |
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| Uncle Clay |
It was a day filled with first encounters!
Our social worker recommended that we do all of the feedings and most of the holding, which we have done. Cadan definitely knows who his mom and dad are! We just love him so so much!
Day 1 April 27, 2011
We were awake on and off throughout the night, at 5am we just couldn't hold in our news any longer, so we sent a mass text to tell our friends about Cadan's birth (And woke many of them up!).
The pediatrician from the hospital came in and said Cadan looked great and could go home that evening once he was a full 24 hours old. It was funny because when she walked into the room this is what she saw...
The time came to leave. What an emotional day! We were so excited to take Cadan home, but our hearts were just breaking for the birthmother. No matter how sure she was that this was the right decision and no matter how confident she was that we were the right parents for Cadan, it doesn't change the fact that she is, in a way, losing a child and must grieve that. As you can imagine we were all crying during the goodbye.
On our way home we stopped at GGma and GGpa Lamb's house. It was time to feed and change Cadan. We were so blessed to have the opportunity to introduce our little man to his great grandparents!
The pediatrician from the hospital came in and said Cadan looked great and could go home that evening once he was a full 24 hours old. It was funny because when she walked into the room this is what she saw...
Haha, she did a double take and said, "Well I don't see this everyday!" But she said it was great to see a dad doing skin to skin, and talked about how important it was that we do skin to skin especially with an adopted baby.
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| It was love at first sight for us! |
The day was filled with feedings and diaper changes, all of that newborn stuff. :) We spent most of the day in the birthmother's room so she could spend time with Cadan. Cadan's biological 16 month old half brother came to meet him too. It was cute. :) We made sure we found things to do so the birthmother had some time alone with Cadan. We felt like this was really her time and she was inviting us into it. We will have so many years to gaze at him and love on him, but this will be her only chance for a while anyway.
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| All of this being born stuff is tiring! |
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| Except Cadan, he was asleep. |
That drive home felt soooo long! We arrived home around 11:30pm and were just exhausted. Thankfully Cadan slept well, only waking up to eat. By the next day we were feeling much better.
Cadan's Birthday April 26, 2011
As I finally sit down to write this I think, how can I cram everything that has happened in the last 9 days into a blog post! lol
You can imagine the reaction from Grandmas, Grandpas, Aunts and Uncles (Many of whom were asleep before we sent the text) Everyone was so excited!
On Tuesday April 26, 2011 around 4:20pm I received a call at work, it was the birthmother's sister in law calling to tell us that the birthmother was in labor! I called Jake and we rushed home to pack our bag, grab the diaper bag and carseat, and rush down to Bakersfield. Around 5:00 we were told the birthmother's contractions were 10 minutes apart. At 6:00 they were 3 minutes apart! We left Oakdale around 6:00. We didn't tell anyone we were headed to Bakersfield...for a couple reasons. 1. If it was a false call we didn't want to get hopes up, 2. We didn't want our phones to be ringing like crazy while we were trying to meet our new son.
About an hour down the road we got a call...He is here!!! In the background we heard baby cries! We were so excited...a little emotional (The speedometer might have crept up a bit). The birthmother's sister in law sent pictures to us right away. Cadan was 6 pounds 12 ounces and 20 inches long.
We found out that he was born 6 minutes after they walked into the hospital! So there is no way we would have made it in time anyway. We didn't mind at tall though. We were just so excited to hear he was doing great and we would meet him so soon!
We arrived at the hospital around 9:15pm and were elated to meet our son! He was so perfect in every way. The birthmother was doing great. Her sister in law and a family friend were there for support too. (Just for a laugh...I totally put my foot in my mouth when I asked the sister in law if the other woman was her mom. They looked a lot alike, but I know better than to say that! Of course it wasn't her mom and they are close to the same age. iyiyi! At least they were good natured about it! lol)
Around 10:30pm we sent a text to our family members with this picture...
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| Cadan Lee 6lb 12oz and 20in |
We spent about 2 hours in the room with the birthmother, then we took Cadan a couple of doors down to another room the hospital prepared for us. The hospital was so awesome! They handled everything so well and were very sensitive to the situation. We were so thankful to have our own room so we could stay and take care of Cadan overnight. He did great, like most couple hour old babies! He slept except for when we woke him up to eat. We didn't sleep a whole lot though. We could hardly believe he was here! This day we had been waiting for for so long! We ended the night with a prayer of thanksgiving to the creator of families. <3
Friday, April 22, 2011
Where we are today...
We have had a great couple weeks! It is astonishing how many people (some who we don't even know) are excited for us, encouraging us, and praying for us. We feel so loved! One of our goals is to spread adoption awareness and acceptance. Maybe through our story others will be impacted...whether it is to adopt themselves, make an adoption plan for their child, let go of stereotypes, or something else all together.
We had some FABULOUS news on Monday. We heard back from a grant we had applied for a few months ago, The Gift of Adoption Fund (check it out at www.giftofadoption.org.) They are going to grant us $1500 to go towards adoption expenses! That is a huge praise! Only $8500 to go. :)
We have the diaper bag all packed, an adorable going home from the hospital outfit. (It is all boy, so if Cadan arrives as a Cambria we will have to make an emergency dash to the store! lol) I think we have all of the last minute items we needed.
I have been e-mailing back and forth with the birth mother's mom. She said there was nothing new to report after the last doctors appointment. Everyone is asking if we have heard if she has progressed or anything, but it really doesn't matter if she has or not. Birth is unpredictable. Someone can one day show no progress at a doctor's appointment and go into labor the next day...or on the other hand they can be 4cm and hang out that way for 3 weeks. So "knowing" won't change anything anyway. We are just ready for whenever the call comes that she is in labor. Today she is 38 weeks and 4 days. So anytime! Her last baby was right on time. (not that that necessarily means anything)
It is interesting to think about the feelings and emotions that have been flooding me. Our social worker told us, and it is true, you really come to love the birth mother and want only what is best for her (Yes, regardless of whatever choice she makes ultimately.) We want to bless her and show her our love and appreciation ...but sometimes I think I don't want her to think we do or say things just because we "want her baby." Which of course isn't how it is, but I don't want any misperceptions. I was talking to our social worker last week and told her how pretty the birth mother looked when we went to dinner. About half way through dinner I wanted to say that, then I started thinking, what if she thinks it is just empty flattery and I am not being genuine? Sangeeta (Our social worker) said to just be ourselves and say something if we think it, that if we are sincere it will come across sincere. I think I over-think things! haha There is also this feeling of protectiveness we feel towards the birth mother. We don't want anyone to stereo type her or judge her. It isn't our place to tell others her story (or any one's business), we don't know all of the whys and how's anyway. She is a sweet and beautiful woman who is making her own best choices for herself and her family out of love for her children. Isn't that enough? There are so many other emotions and such...like I am DONE working! haha I have everything prepared to go out on maternity leave and I feel done. My head is not in my work anymore...it is in mommy mode. (I am going to work up until we get "The Call") I have twinges of jealousy over the fact that bio mommies get time off before baby comes and more after. I want to buy everything in sight but know I must not. lol We are excited, a tad anxious at times, and more excited.
So that is where we are right now...ready and waiting. We cannot wait to meet him!
Thank you again, each and every one of you, for all of your support and encouragement!
We had some FABULOUS news on Monday. We heard back from a grant we had applied for a few months ago, The Gift of Adoption Fund (check it out at www.giftofadoption.org.) They are going to grant us $1500 to go towards adoption expenses! That is a huge praise! Only $8500 to go. :)
We have the diaper bag all packed, an adorable going home from the hospital outfit. (It is all boy, so if Cadan arrives as a Cambria we will have to make an emergency dash to the store! lol) I think we have all of the last minute items we needed.
I have been e-mailing back and forth with the birth mother's mom. She said there was nothing new to report after the last doctors appointment. Everyone is asking if we have heard if she has progressed or anything, but it really doesn't matter if she has or not. Birth is unpredictable. Someone can one day show no progress at a doctor's appointment and go into labor the next day...or on the other hand they can be 4cm and hang out that way for 3 weeks. So "knowing" won't change anything anyway. We are just ready for whenever the call comes that she is in labor. Today she is 38 weeks and 4 days. So anytime! Her last baby was right on time. (not that that necessarily means anything)
It is interesting to think about the feelings and emotions that have been flooding me. Our social worker told us, and it is true, you really come to love the birth mother and want only what is best for her (Yes, regardless of whatever choice she makes ultimately.) We want to bless her and show her our love and appreciation ...but sometimes I think I don't want her to think we do or say things just because we "want her baby." Which of course isn't how it is, but I don't want any misperceptions. I was talking to our social worker last week and told her how pretty the birth mother looked when we went to dinner. About half way through dinner I wanted to say that, then I started thinking, what if she thinks it is just empty flattery and I am not being genuine? Sangeeta (Our social worker) said to just be ourselves and say something if we think it, that if we are sincere it will come across sincere. I think I over-think things! haha There is also this feeling of protectiveness we feel towards the birth mother. We don't want anyone to stereo type her or judge her. It isn't our place to tell others her story (or any one's business), we don't know all of the whys and how's anyway. She is a sweet and beautiful woman who is making her own best choices for herself and her family out of love for her children. Isn't that enough? There are so many other emotions and such...like I am DONE working! haha I have everything prepared to go out on maternity leave and I feel done. My head is not in my work anymore...it is in mommy mode. (I am going to work up until we get "The Call") I have twinges of jealousy over the fact that bio mommies get time off before baby comes and more after. I want to buy everything in sight but know I must not. lol We are excited, a tad anxious at times, and more excited.
So that is where we are right now...ready and waiting. We cannot wait to meet him!
Thank you again, each and every one of you, for all of your support and encouragement!
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Second Match Meeting
On Friday we had our second match meeting with our soon to be baby's birth mother and her family. We decided to stay overnight since we were all the way in Bakersfield and the meeting wasn't until 5pm.
We drove down with no issues and checked into a Holiday Inn Express (Thanks for using your points for the room Dad!). We chose this hotel because it is close to the hospital where the birth mother will be delivering. We wanted to explore the lay of the land a little since we won't know until that day if we will need to get a hotel or if we will be able to stay in the hospital with the baby.
We met with the birth mother, her parents, sister, and social worker at a restaurant. We also had the privilege of meeting her 15 month old son. He is SOOO cute! Jake just kept looking at him saying "Wow!" To think that our child will probably look very similar to him at that age! It was nice being in a very relaxed atmosphere to get to know each other better. The birth mother said she has been doing great throughout her pregnancy and her doctor said the baby looks very healthy. We mostly just chatted, but we did have some business to attend to.
We talked about the hospital plan. The birth mother said she would like me in the labor and delivery room if we get there in time. (Her first baby came in a couple of hours!) She said she would like to be the first one to hold the baby, then she would like me to. She said she would like Jake to come in as soon as she is covered up so he can have a chance to hold the baby right away. She said she would like Jake and I to provide most of the care for baby in the hospital. The social worker said they will try to arrange everything with the hospital ahead of time so we can have a room (But there are no guarantees...every hospital is different) The birth mother will be able to still see baby as much as she wants to in the hospital. We had to sign documents allowing the social worker to release our identifying information to the hospital. We also have to send her pictures so they can be given to the hospital so they know who we are. The birth mother's mom or sister in law will call us when she goes into labor.
We also talked about the Open Adoption Plan. Everything is pretty standard. We are to provide pictures and letter updates every three months for the first 2 years, then twice a year after that until the child is 18. Four visits will be planned in the first year with one per year after that. Of course this can be flexible if circumstances need it to be.
The whole birth family is extremely sweet and open. We feel like communication will be a strength in this relationship. Most of our contact at this time is set to go through the birth mother's parents. Usually the adoptive family communicates directly with the birth mother, but in this case the birth mother feels like she might need some time before she is ready for contact. We assured her that we want to be sensitive to her feelings and realize they can change at any time. We gave her our cell phone numbers and told her to feel free to text or call any time. That we will wait for her to initiate contact. Until then we will send all photos and updates to her mom who can make them available to her as she is ready. (What a bitter-sweet process this is...) We told the family that we are open to the visits including the birth mother's parents, sisters, and son. We found out she is making a scrapbook with pictures of herself growing up as well as pictures of their whole family. She is also working on a letter that she can send home with the baby. We are so happy we will be able to have this to share with our child!
After a show put on by the birth mother's son, showing us how quick he is and how high he can jump!, we parted and marveled at the fact that next time we are together we will be at the hospital!
The next morning Jake and I went to the hospital where the birth mother plans to deliver. We found out where to go if she were in Labor and Delivery or in Postpartum. We also found the nearest Starbucks (Ha!).
On our way home we stopped at the Tulare Outlet Mall and hit a couple of fun stores... Gymboree, Osh kosh, Carters... :) We picked up a couple of cute boy outfits and a diaper bag. Time to have it ready to go! We met our friend Ashlee at the outlets and for lunch. It was a fun break on our drive home.
Tomorrow the birth mother will be 37 weeks along! We are making our lists of things that need to be done ASAP to be ready for baby. All of the major bases are covered...there are just little things here and there we want to have done.
I think that is pretty much it, more updates to come! :)
We drove down with no issues and checked into a Holiday Inn Express (Thanks for using your points for the room Dad!). We chose this hotel because it is close to the hospital where the birth mother will be delivering. We wanted to explore the lay of the land a little since we won't know until that day if we will need to get a hotel or if we will be able to stay in the hospital with the baby.
We met with the birth mother, her parents, sister, and social worker at a restaurant. We also had the privilege of meeting her 15 month old son. He is SOOO cute! Jake just kept looking at him saying "Wow!" To think that our child will probably look very similar to him at that age! It was nice being in a very relaxed atmosphere to get to know each other better. The birth mother said she has been doing great throughout her pregnancy and her doctor said the baby looks very healthy. We mostly just chatted, but we did have some business to attend to.
We talked about the hospital plan. The birth mother said she would like me in the labor and delivery room if we get there in time. (Her first baby came in a couple of hours!) She said she would like to be the first one to hold the baby, then she would like me to. She said she would like Jake to come in as soon as she is covered up so he can have a chance to hold the baby right away. She said she would like Jake and I to provide most of the care for baby in the hospital. The social worker said they will try to arrange everything with the hospital ahead of time so we can have a room (But there are no guarantees...every hospital is different) The birth mother will be able to still see baby as much as she wants to in the hospital. We had to sign documents allowing the social worker to release our identifying information to the hospital. We also have to send her pictures so they can be given to the hospital so they know who we are. The birth mother's mom or sister in law will call us when she goes into labor.
We also talked about the Open Adoption Plan. Everything is pretty standard. We are to provide pictures and letter updates every three months for the first 2 years, then twice a year after that until the child is 18. Four visits will be planned in the first year with one per year after that. Of course this can be flexible if circumstances need it to be.
The whole birth family is extremely sweet and open. We feel like communication will be a strength in this relationship. Most of our contact at this time is set to go through the birth mother's parents. Usually the adoptive family communicates directly with the birth mother, but in this case the birth mother feels like she might need some time before she is ready for contact. We assured her that we want to be sensitive to her feelings and realize they can change at any time. We gave her our cell phone numbers and told her to feel free to text or call any time. That we will wait for her to initiate contact. Until then we will send all photos and updates to her mom who can make them available to her as she is ready. (What a bitter-sweet process this is...) We told the family that we are open to the visits including the birth mother's parents, sisters, and son. We found out she is making a scrapbook with pictures of herself growing up as well as pictures of their whole family. She is also working on a letter that she can send home with the baby. We are so happy we will be able to have this to share with our child!
After a show put on by the birth mother's son, showing us how quick he is and how high he can jump!, we parted and marveled at the fact that next time we are together we will be at the hospital!
The next morning Jake and I went to the hospital where the birth mother plans to deliver. We found out where to go if she were in Labor and Delivery or in Postpartum. We also found the nearest Starbucks (Ha!).
On our way home we stopped at the Tulare Outlet Mall and hit a couple of fun stores... Gymboree, Osh kosh, Carters... :) We picked up a couple of cute boy outfits and a diaper bag. Time to have it ready to go! We met our friend Ashlee at the outlets and for lunch. It was a fun break on our drive home.
Tomorrow the birth mother will be 37 weeks along! We are making our lists of things that need to be done ASAP to be ready for baby. All of the major bases are covered...there are just little things here and there we want to have done.
I think that is pretty much it, more updates to come! :)
Monday, April 4, 2011
Joy!
Oh the joy of anticipation! We are so excited about our second match meeting with the birth mother on Friday. We plan to find a hotel close to the hospital she will be delivering at and stay overnight then check out the hospital and such on Saturday. (Yes, I have that type A must have a list and be prepared personality! haha)
We feel so blessed by the outpouring of encouragement from friends and family. Thank you all so very much! It is awesome to have so many along for the ride!
We can't wait to meet Baby Cadan (Or Cambria if the ultra sound is wrong ;-) )
<3
We feel so blessed by the outpouring of encouragement from friends and family. Thank you all so very much! It is awesome to have so many along for the ride!
We can't wait to meet Baby Cadan (Or Cambria if the ultra sound is wrong ;-) )
<3
Friday, April 1, 2011
The Match Meeting
Just an overview of how Bethany Christian Services works... They have birth families look over profiles and choose one family to interview. So it isn't like they interview everyone then pick. By the time they interview an adoptive family they have already "picked" them and the match meeting is more of a confirmation of that choice.
As you can imagine the last week and a half was a time of total anticipation. It has been so awesome to be able to pray for our potential child's birth mother by name. We have been enjoying the time of excitement, but have been guarding our hearts as well because nothing is for certain.
Yesterday we woke up perfectly refreshed. We thought we might not be able to sleep, but we did! I made some cookies to take with us while I drank my morning coffee. The morning was so beautiful! On our way out the door Jake was talking to our friend Chad. (Chad and his wife Rica have adopted 2 kids through Bethany and have been a huge support to us. They recently moved to Ohio, but were back in town for a visit this week) He told us they were just having breakfast and to stop by. It was so good to see them and be encouraged by them and to pray with them. God is cool how he works even the little things out! We picked up some pictures we wanted to share, got gas and a carwash, then were on our way to Bakersfield!
We arrived 1 1/2 hours early to the meeting place. So we had some time to kill. We spent that time talking, praying and playing on the iPhones. (What did we do before iPhones? haha) We saw one car pull up and decided it looked like the social workers (Our social worker wasn't there, just the birth mother counselor, this was her first match meeting, so her boss was there too.). Then we saw another car pull up and Jake was like, It is them! I see our profile in the girl's hand! Then we both got really nervous and decided not to look. We didn't want to go in until 3:30 in case the birth family and their social worker needed time to talk before we came. We prayed one last time then went in.
When we walked in we were greeted by the social worker and she took us into the meeting room. It was packed! lol I don't think match meetings usually involve so many people, but it was great because everyone was there to support the birth mom. We met the birth mother, her parents, her sister, and her sister in law in addition to the social workers. Everyone was very sweet and supportive of the birth mother and her adoption plan. We found out that the birth mother had been adopted herself along with her sister. Her parents had over 85 foster children over the years and put us at ease telling us they knew how we felt because they had been in our shoes before. The social worker facilitated the meeting which helped get the ball rolling. She had us talk about our marriage and how we met. We talked about our jobs, family, and all of those basics. We learned more about the birth mother and her wishes for her child. She said she just wants us to give her child a good life. That is what is most important to her. We talked about our plans to homeschool, our views on discipline, our faith. It was cool because her parents are both pastors so it was really easy to talk about our faith and what it means to us.
We asked why she chose us, what stood out in our profile. She said we were #3 of the profiles she looked at. Once she read ours she did not put it down while looking at all of the others. She said she knew it would be us, but wanted to read more just in case. She said one thing that drew her to us was that Jake looked like her brother. :) She said that she knew she wanted us to be the adoptive parents, but now that she met us she was she knew for sure.
I guess typically they want you to wait a day or so and talk about it, then let the social worker know (on both sides) if you want to proceed. The birth mother's dad was like, "I thought it was already a done deal!" lol The birth mother said she had already made her decision, so we set up our second match meeting. We will meet next Friday and talk about hospital plans, what kind of contact is desired, etc. Soooo, if all goes well little Cadan Lee McCormack (Its a Boy!) will be coming home in 3-6 weeks or so!
***A little disclaimer... People are the variable in adoption, and there is no way to predict what people might do. So nothing is final until it is final. We have decided to allow ourselves to be happy, excited, joyful, etc. If something doesnt work out we will know that it is all in God's plan. It will hurt though and we would have to grieve the loss. But we don't want to hold back our joy based on the "what if's."
On our way home we were quiet most of the time, just allowing it all to sink in. To think that we would probably be driving the same road within a matter of weeks with a baby in the back seat!
God has so blessed us through this process and we know He will continue to do so. We can't wait to have more updates!
<3
As you can imagine the last week and a half was a time of total anticipation. It has been so awesome to be able to pray for our potential child's birth mother by name. We have been enjoying the time of excitement, but have been guarding our hearts as well because nothing is for certain.
Yesterday we woke up perfectly refreshed. We thought we might not be able to sleep, but we did! I made some cookies to take with us while I drank my morning coffee. The morning was so beautiful! On our way out the door Jake was talking to our friend Chad. (Chad and his wife Rica have adopted 2 kids through Bethany and have been a huge support to us. They recently moved to Ohio, but were back in town for a visit this week) He told us they were just having breakfast and to stop by. It was so good to see them and be encouraged by them and to pray with them. God is cool how he works even the little things out! We picked up some pictures we wanted to share, got gas and a carwash, then were on our way to Bakersfield!
We arrived 1 1/2 hours early to the meeting place. So we had some time to kill. We spent that time talking, praying and playing on the iPhones. (What did we do before iPhones? haha) We saw one car pull up and decided it looked like the social workers (Our social worker wasn't there, just the birth mother counselor, this was her first match meeting, so her boss was there too.). Then we saw another car pull up and Jake was like, It is them! I see our profile in the girl's hand! Then we both got really nervous and decided not to look. We didn't want to go in until 3:30 in case the birth family and their social worker needed time to talk before we came. We prayed one last time then went in.
When we walked in we were greeted by the social worker and she took us into the meeting room. It was packed! lol I don't think match meetings usually involve so many people, but it was great because everyone was there to support the birth mom. We met the birth mother, her parents, her sister, and her sister in law in addition to the social workers. Everyone was very sweet and supportive of the birth mother and her adoption plan. We found out that the birth mother had been adopted herself along with her sister. Her parents had over 85 foster children over the years and put us at ease telling us they knew how we felt because they had been in our shoes before. The social worker facilitated the meeting which helped get the ball rolling. She had us talk about our marriage and how we met. We talked about our jobs, family, and all of those basics. We learned more about the birth mother and her wishes for her child. She said she just wants us to give her child a good life. That is what is most important to her. We talked about our plans to homeschool, our views on discipline, our faith. It was cool because her parents are both pastors so it was really easy to talk about our faith and what it means to us.
We asked why she chose us, what stood out in our profile. She said we were #3 of the profiles she looked at. Once she read ours she did not put it down while looking at all of the others. She said she knew it would be us, but wanted to read more just in case. She said one thing that drew her to us was that Jake looked like her brother. :) She said that she knew she wanted us to be the adoptive parents, but now that she met us she was she knew for sure.
I guess typically they want you to wait a day or so and talk about it, then let the social worker know (on both sides) if you want to proceed. The birth mother's dad was like, "I thought it was already a done deal!" lol The birth mother said she had already made her decision, so we set up our second match meeting. We will meet next Friday and talk about hospital plans, what kind of contact is desired, etc. Soooo, if all goes well little Cadan Lee McCormack (Its a Boy!) will be coming home in 3-6 weeks or so!
***A little disclaimer... People are the variable in adoption, and there is no way to predict what people might do. So nothing is final until it is final. We have decided to allow ourselves to be happy, excited, joyful, etc. If something doesnt work out we will know that it is all in God's plan. It will hurt though and we would have to grieve the loss. But we don't want to hold back our joy based on the "what if's."
On our way home we were quiet most of the time, just allowing it all to sink in. To think that we would probably be driving the same road within a matter of weeks with a baby in the back seat!
God has so blessed us through this process and we know He will continue to do so. We can't wait to have more updates!
<3
"Birth Mother Interested in You"
I have been dying to write about this, but we were keeping it on the DL until we knew more...
Last week on Tuesday (March 22nd) we received an e-mail from our social worker, the subject was "Birth Mother Interested in You!," (Yes, just days after I posted my rant! In fact, our profile had already been pulled by then!) I was at work when I saw the e-mail and just about fainted! I am glad it was an e-mail first. Sangeeta attached some basic information about the birth mother and what was known about the birth father. I was able to go over it and call Jake, (who was at work also) then call Sangeeta back. I closed the door to my office and said I had to make a phone call. I was shaking all over. When I called Jake he was so excited too! While we haven't been officially waiting very long, we have been since 2007 in a way since that is when we decided we were ready to start a family. Getting this call was like the first positive pregnancy test after taking so many! I was so useless at work that day. I went back and forth from feeling nauseous to being so excited. My emotions were all over the place. Someone said, well at least you don't have to deal with morning sickness...I told them it was all day sickness for a couple days! lol
Some of the things we found out about the birth mother...
She is due May 2nd!
She has a very supportive family. That is something we have been praying for specifically.
She is half Hispanic and half African American
She said she wanted an adoptive family who was married, active, and Christians. (Thats us!)
Our social worker didn't know the gender of the baby, so that was something to look forward to maybe finding out at our match meeting.
Not a lot is known about the birth father except that he is African American.
So we set up a match meeting for Thursday March 31st in Bakersfield and thought the day would never come! haha That will be the next post!
Last week on Tuesday (March 22nd) we received an e-mail from our social worker, the subject was "Birth Mother Interested in You!," (Yes, just days after I posted my rant! In fact, our profile had already been pulled by then!) I was at work when I saw the e-mail and just about fainted! I am glad it was an e-mail first. Sangeeta attached some basic information about the birth mother and what was known about the birth father. I was able to go over it and call Jake, (who was at work also) then call Sangeeta back. I closed the door to my office and said I had to make a phone call. I was shaking all over. When I called Jake he was so excited too! While we haven't been officially waiting very long, we have been since 2007 in a way since that is when we decided we were ready to start a family. Getting this call was like the first positive pregnancy test after taking so many! I was so useless at work that day. I went back and forth from feeling nauseous to being so excited. My emotions were all over the place. Someone said, well at least you don't have to deal with morning sickness...I told them it was all day sickness for a couple days! lol
Some of the things we found out about the birth mother...
She is due May 2nd!
She has a very supportive family. That is something we have been praying for specifically.
She is half Hispanic and half African American
She said she wanted an adoptive family who was married, active, and Christians. (Thats us!)
Our social worker didn't know the gender of the baby, so that was something to look forward to maybe finding out at our match meeting.
Not a lot is known about the birth father except that he is African American.
So we set up a match meeting for Thursday March 31st in Bakersfield and thought the day would never come! haha That will be the next post!
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
We had a great chat with our social worker last night. We talked a little bit more about how the whole process works once we are matched and baby is born. We found out that the placement fee isn't due until after relinquishment is completed and the adoption is for sure a go. That is helpful timing wise. We were trying to figure out whether to get a loan or credit card now or wait until we were further along in the process, but then we didn't want to wait until the baby was born and have just 48 hours! So it was good to know that we will have a couple of weeks or so. We also talked about what happens if the birth father is unable to be found and that whole process. We are so thankful to have found Bethany Christian Services and to be working with such an awesome social worker!!!
By the way... We are so happy to be a waiting family! (But we can't wait until the wait is over! lol)
By the way... We are so happy to be a waiting family! (But we can't wait until the wait is over! lol)
Friday, March 25, 2011
Books
I bought some fun books today...thanks to a Barnes and Noble birthday gift card from soon to be Auntie Crystal!
Today when Taylor (My 10 month old niece) came to play we were reading books and I realized I didn't have any baby books that appealed to the sense of touch!
So I bought...
and
Since Black, White, and Red patterns and shapes are so great for a baby's development.
One last thing....
We want to introduce some basic signs to our baby, this looked like a low key book/flashcard kit!
All this for like $7 after using my gift card and a 10% off coupon! WooHoo!
Today we are also working on adoption funding...$10,000 to go! Prayers in that area are appreciated!
Today when Taylor (My 10 month old niece) came to play we were reading books and I realized I didn't have any baby books that appealed to the sense of touch!
So I bought...
andBoth have different materials for babies to feel on each page. :)
I also bought...
Since Black, White, and Red patterns and shapes are so great for a baby's development.
One last thing....
We want to introduce some basic signs to our baby, this looked like a low key book/flashcard kit!
All this for like $7 after using my gift card and a 10% off coupon! WooHoo!
Today we are also working on adoption funding...$10,000 to go! Prayers in that area are appreciated!
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
God = Peace
It's funny, because as I posted that long selfish rant I knew that as soon as I got my whining out of the way and gave it to God I would feel much better! So I talked to God, and my husband. Guess what!?!? I am at peace! He (God) is so good to hear his childrens unfaithful whining over and over, yet forgives and gives peace every time.
Can't wait to be able to share exciting news! Hope it will be soon!
<3
Can't wait to be able to share exciting news! Hope it will be soon!
<3
Friday, March 18, 2011
Emotions
This post might get long and rambling...so beware! But that is what a blog is for, right?!? LOL
I have been very emotional the last couple of days and realized that a lot of my emotion was surrounding our adoption. I realized that although I tried not to, I listened to everyone who said they didn't think we would have a long wait and set myself up for disappointment. Granted, 4 months is not a ridiculous amount of time at all! haha But for some reason I had March in my head and here we are half way through March with no exciting news. This post is all about me being transparent...not correct!
In November when we submitted our profile we were told that everyone loves our profile and have been told that several times since. It is so hard to think that this profile that we created, this 12 page book about us, is how a woman will choose us to raise the child she is carrying and loves so much. We had 12 pages to show who we are, what we believe, the kind of life we will give our child, what is important to us, etc. Realistically our past, present, and future (as well as the future of our children) are being evaluated in 12 pages. I sit and think sometimes, what must the birth families think as they look through so many profiles? Were we able to convey who we are? Does it make sense? Can they hear our heart?
We received our second denial letter from grants we had applied for today. That is tough too. Not the money aspect really...but that they base whether or not they will give us funding based on the story that we tell. Now that might not seem like it has much to do with the profile, but it does in my brain! I start to wonder...was our story not moving enough, special enough? No, we don't have a long drawn out dramatic story. We are just two people who want very much to raise a little family in a little house, in a little town. Does that make us ununique (Which I'm sure isn't a word!)? Now, my head knows that funding is tight...I work at a non profit for heaven sake! lol So I know that it isn't anything personal. But my heart does hurt sometimes.
Most days I am just excited about our adoption...but there are hard days too. Today is a hard day. I know that someday we will look back on this time of waiting and it will seem so short in the grand scheme of things, but today it feels long.
I know that God's timing is so perfect. I know that He already knows who our child will be. I know that even if we wait for a year, or more (!) that it will be right because that is the child God intended for us. But me, from my tiny perspective, says I want Him to hurry up! lol I want to get to the next part of this journey!
My heart has been set on being a mom for the last 4 years. The last 4 months so much more so! I have heard so many comments like, oh you'll see, just wait until you are a mom, or you can't even imagine...just wait. (For many different scenarios) Well I already know! In my heart I am already there! I hate getting angry over silly and totally innocent comments, and I don't say anything, but I want to freak out sometimes! I am yelling on the inside! haha (And the just wait comments...well I am queen of just waiting, so you don't need to tell me that! ;) ) BTW...I am not directing this AT anyone...so please don't take it personally!
I feel that in order for this blog to be a true reflection of our adoption process, it is important to allow you to see the not so rosy side.
I feel so blessed, and I know Jake does too, that God chose us to be adoptive parents. While there are some of "Those Days" I am so thankful to be able to give it back to God and know that He has a plan. Not sure how people can go through life without a relationship with God!
There you have it, my first rant. haha
:)
I have been very emotional the last couple of days and realized that a lot of my emotion was surrounding our adoption. I realized that although I tried not to, I listened to everyone who said they didn't think we would have a long wait and set myself up for disappointment. Granted, 4 months is not a ridiculous amount of time at all! haha But for some reason I had March in my head and here we are half way through March with no exciting news. This post is all about me being transparent...not correct!
In November when we submitted our profile we were told that everyone loves our profile and have been told that several times since. It is so hard to think that this profile that we created, this 12 page book about us, is how a woman will choose us to raise the child she is carrying and loves so much. We had 12 pages to show who we are, what we believe, the kind of life we will give our child, what is important to us, etc. Realistically our past, present, and future (as well as the future of our children) are being evaluated in 12 pages. I sit and think sometimes, what must the birth families think as they look through so many profiles? Were we able to convey who we are? Does it make sense? Can they hear our heart?
We received our second denial letter from grants we had applied for today. That is tough too. Not the money aspect really...but that they base whether or not they will give us funding based on the story that we tell. Now that might not seem like it has much to do with the profile, but it does in my brain! I start to wonder...was our story not moving enough, special enough? No, we don't have a long drawn out dramatic story. We are just two people who want very much to raise a little family in a little house, in a little town. Does that make us ununique (Which I'm sure isn't a word!)? Now, my head knows that funding is tight...I work at a non profit for heaven sake! lol So I know that it isn't anything personal. But my heart does hurt sometimes.
Most days I am just excited about our adoption...but there are hard days too. Today is a hard day. I know that someday we will look back on this time of waiting and it will seem so short in the grand scheme of things, but today it feels long.
I know that God's timing is so perfect. I know that He already knows who our child will be. I know that even if we wait for a year, or more (!) that it will be right because that is the child God intended for us. But me, from my tiny perspective, says I want Him to hurry up! lol I want to get to the next part of this journey!
My heart has been set on being a mom for the last 4 years. The last 4 months so much more so! I have heard so many comments like, oh you'll see, just wait until you are a mom, or you can't even imagine...just wait. (For many different scenarios) Well I already know! In my heart I am already there! I hate getting angry over silly and totally innocent comments, and I don't say anything, but I want to freak out sometimes! I am yelling on the inside! haha (And the just wait comments...well I am queen of just waiting, so you don't need to tell me that! ;) ) BTW...I am not directing this AT anyone...so please don't take it personally!
I feel that in order for this blog to be a true reflection of our adoption process, it is important to allow you to see the not so rosy side.
I feel so blessed, and I know Jake does too, that God chose us to be adoptive parents. While there are some of "Those Days" I am so thankful to be able to give it back to God and know that He has a plan. Not sure how people can go through life without a relationship with God!
There you have it, my first rant. haha
:)
Friday, January 21, 2011
Updating...
I know I haven't posted in a while...we are asked all the time, " Have you heard anything yet?" Well, the answer is no, but that is to be expected! We told our social worker we didn't want to hear anything until we had a match. We can ask how often our profile has been shown, were we ever "runner up," etc. But we have chosen not to know. We know that once our profile is in the hands of our child's birth mother it will speak to her heart because it is meant for her. Whether that means she is the first one to look at our profile or the 200th, it is meant for her and we know she will find us when the time is right.
In the meantime we have continued to read our adoption books.
We have made sure our home is surprise social worker visit ready (though that wouldn't happen until after baby is here).
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| Plug Covers |
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| Getting used to pushing down on the cabinet latches |
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| Excuse the mess, but cleaning supplies moved to a high shelf. |
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| I think Buck is excited too! |
We have been basking in the sense of anticipation!!!
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| Our families have been too! Baby McCormack was spoiled this Christmas! Notice the lion pillow pet, rocking horse, teddy bear, picture... lol All from friends and family who are anticipating with us! |
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| I have a baby shoe problem! Shhhh! ;) |
I am not going to lie and say we never get anxious or wish baby was already here. There are times we see people with their new bio babies and think, iyiyi, why can't it be that easy for us! (I'm being honest here!) But during those times we just have to remind ourselves and each other that God's timing is perfect!
So...next time you want to ask if we have heard anything yet the answer will still probably be no. I'm telling you, if there is news to share I promise, you will hear!!! lol Someone told me the other day they think all of Oakdale will hear us scream when we get "The Call"! I may be dramatic at times, but screaming really isn't me. ;)
Thank you all for your love and encouragement and support!!!!
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